Smell my feet!

Happy Halloween!

Not much to report today. I ate out a ton over the weekend. I was a little alarmed, but went ahead and weighed in this morning and my weight was....*drum roll* 181. WTH!?! I'm not upset to have not gained weight, but I just find it so odd that the body decides sometimes --BAM!-- no more. This is the weight I'm going to stay at.

Nothing new or exciting to report. I'm actually making a list of things I want to accomplish. I'm thinking I'll make daily, weekly, and monthly goals. Maybe 1 or 2 really long term goals, like being able to dress as something exceptionally slutty for next halloween =0p

My NSV for today: My sister and I went grocery shopping together. She decided she *had* to have some sort of cake, and sense she wanted it last week too, I figured she might as well indulge. Afterall, you have a craving for 2 weeks, it probably isn't just going to go away. She bought a 6 pack of cupcakes at the store. I ate one, she ate 5. hehe. yay me! and don't think I threw her under the bus either....she is a tiny little thing. She eats *all* the time and it has yet to catch up to her.

Hope everyone has a safe, fun Halloween night. I'm going to drive the hour to go visit my b/f. I'm not exactly sure why since it isn't a "big" holiday, but I feel sad being apart on special occasions.

TRICK OR TREAT!!!!

More of nothing

*sigh* I have no structure or purpose in life. Now, I'm not saying that to be a jackass or one of those people that mope and groan about how awful life is.....my life is awesome....it just has little to no purpse. LoL.

You know those days where you look around and think to yourself, "what have I accomplished today?" That is the type of day I am having. What have I done. Well, I woke up (always a good start), ate a granola bar and drank a diet coke. Emptied the dishwasher. Listened to my little sister lament about being hungry. Cooked some lunch. Ate lunch. Talked to another sister on the phone. Emailed dad. Played video games --which in turn had me talking with my brother-- then ended up here wondering how it was all ready 3:00 in the afternoon.

I've always been a planner. I like oraganizing things, it is just the implementation of those plans that I struggle with....I have so many plans....but I do nothing with them. Instead I let the day pass without anything of significance being accomplished. I've got to start setting and meeting goals. Geez I need to get myself on track.

God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time;Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace.Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is,not as I would have it. Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life, and supremely happy with Him forever in the next. Amen

Wednesday Report =0p

Okay, okay! I know I said I'd be back Tuesday. Nobody is going to believe me if I keep coming back late =0p But here I am!!

So, after a weekend of over-eating and a week of not being very good (mmm....chinese for dinner last night!) I am still 183 pounds. Hmm....that seems so wrong! I should be back up to 190, but don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I have been keeping busy around the house trying to get stuff organized, as well as busy in school work (less time for snacking!) so maybe that evened things out a little. Either way, I wish I had been good and dropped some weight this week because --insert drum roll here-- the boyfriend has off Thursday and Friday this week. I emailed him earlier today that I wasn't sure what time I'd be up at his house and he sent back a response of "...if you make it up here early, we can eat at your favorite restaurant" *giggle* I need to find a less fattening favorite restaurant =)

This weekend we have a wedding to go to. The b/f is actually a groomsman in the wedding, so we have go show up friday night for a rehersal too. Well, technically, I don't have to show up, but since I was invited, I don't know....seems a little rude to not show up. Wedding is Saturday, so this weekend will pretty much be a lost cause. Speaking of lost causes, I had to call and make ANOTHER appt for the b/f's truck. Stupid truck won't start when it rains. The last place we took it to wanted to charge $600 for repairs. He declined service and we've lived with the fear of rain for months now. the problem didn't get any better as the rainy months approached and onset on us, so Thursday, we're shipping the truck to another repair clinic. *crosses fingers* hope this repair bill comes in at less cost --AND--fixes the problem. My vote on what's broke.... spark plugs! I think they have too much carbon build up on them. hehe. That's what was wrong with my riding lawn mower *snickers* I like to cross apply that learning =0p

well, I better leave off here. I prob. won't be back until next monday or tuesday (do you still believe me? =0p ) but for now....I have to get ready to take a test! Wish me luck!!

Early Weekend

Yay! The boyfriend has tomorrow off work, so I'm taking an early weekend from blogging =D I'll be back Monday....Tuesday at the latest =0p

Take care!

Another day

Not much to talk about today. I woke up fairly early for me today. I was up by 9:30am to make sure I was around for moral support for the b/f. He decided to "brush up" on his interviewing skills and apply out for a new job. I don't think he is very serious about this new job, he has a great job all ready (that just gave him a raise! yay!!) but I still wanted to be around if he wanted to blow off a little nervous energy with a phone call or email.

While I waited for that call/email (that never came --I wish I had half the confidence he has in situations like that!) I cleaned the kitchen, hand washed my pots and pans, and got all the dishes into the dishwasher. I also swept the floor (my house is hardwood), but I got lazy and decided to eat lunch before doing the mopping. Or, in other words, the mopping didn't get done. Oh well, I still felt pretty happy about getting a majority of the stuff I wanted cleaned, clean before noon. Lunch was taco soup, which is fairly healthy stuff. Of course, about an hour and a half after I finished eating, my little sis asked if I wanted a biscuit. Mmmm...hot out of the oven biscuits! One of my all time favorite foods. I said "yes" but I only ate one, so I didn't feel *too* bad. Dinner was chicken and brown rice, so once again, I felt pretty good about my food choice. *grins* When the little sis proposed an ice cream run to McDonalds though, I once again caved. Mmmm....caramel ice cream sundaes! With peanuts on top! *drools* It was amazing. I loved every bite of it, but I feel a little bad about it now. especially since the boyfriend called me up saying he was "really" in the mood for sweet. hehe. I didn't share the info with him that I had just gobbled up some ice cream. Oh well, I did drink my liter of water today, so I feel pretty happy about that. I also got a lot of fiber in with today's meals, which was also a goal for me. So, even though I wasn't completely "on" with a diet today, I did make progress in the right direction. I even made sure to nibble something for breakfast --even though breakfast is by far my least favorite meal of the day.

i'm sleepy. Time for me to head to bed. Night night fellow bloggers!

Update

Thanks everyone for welcoming me back. I read my last couple of blog posts before the disappearance and I thought I'd update you all on a few things I've talked about in the past.

My sister did get induced on my birthday. To be somewhat fair about it, she felt really bad about having me watch her kids on my birthday. I think she even felt a little bit bad about me having to share my birthday. I don't know....I'm not bitter about it anymore. It is just kind of one of those "family things" where you like to bitch about it a lot before it happens and afterwards it doesn't seem like such a big deal. My new nephew is happy and healthy and growing like a weed. He is a pretty adorable little guy. Also pretty funny because if he gets anywhere near you, he starts nuzzling and trying to suck. Greedy little guy. I often have to remind him that my boobies are mine. Boys! They sure do learn early =0p

Another thing I like to bitch about often in my blog is my little sister and housemate. *sigh* I still have to say, she is driving me batty. Honestly, I have never in my life met a person with less self-initiative. She called me a couple of weeks ago and asked how to change the battery in the smoke alarm. It is not a complicated smoke alarm.....the battery case is right on the front and easy to open. But she couldn't do it on her own without asking for directions. This weekend, I called her 8 times and she never once rang me back. When I saw her today, she said "yeah, I got your message this morning." Umm....in one of the voicemails I left, I said something along the lines of "I don't care when you get this message. Call me back immediately" *sigh* She frustrates me *SOOOO* much. She is about to turn 20 and she can't/won't do anything without asking permission first. She never picks up on her own. She refuses to take responsability for anything. UGH! When I decided to get my master's degree (in Communication for those of you that have asked) my parents kind of made an "unspoken/unofficial" deal with me. That deal was, they'd buy a house for us girls to live in (instead of the dorms) if I agreed to watch over little sis and make sure she was okay. I'm about to the point where I'd rather live in the dorms than play mother to a teenager. *rolls eyes* We're just *such* different personality types. Even though I tend to be cautious, I cannot just be an absent observer in life. *growls* Even thinking about her is starting to annoy me. What an awful thing to say about ones family!!! Love the girl to death, but yeah, wish I could change her and know that I can't.

As for my weight....after another weekend of being bad, bad, BAD! I am up to 184 again. *sigh* I'm not particularly upset by that number because I know by Friday I'll be back down to 180 or 179. The thing that saddens me is I'll eat like a pig and be back to 184 (or heaven forbid higher!) by next Monday again. Really a pretty predictable cycle for me. Yeah, I know how to break that cycle. Eat healthier and move my butt on occasion --preferrably further than the couch to the microwave =0p --but with the boyfriend taking off a lot of time from work (he has to burn off vacation days before the end of the year) I know we'll be doing a lot more eating out. Maybe at least we'll get into the habit of going out and walking again. We had been doing that a lot and the weather is nice and cool now =0)

=0)

Wow! I have to say....if I miss one day typing in this thing, then I miss a couple of months. hehe. Sorry about those that actually wondered where I was. Basically, I was doing school work. =)

The semester has started and though I don't have a heavy course load, I'm really struggling with staying focused on working on my Masters thesis. *sigh* Nothing like trying to pick a direction on a 60-100 page paper. It has to be something I love, or I know I'll never finish it. I have my parents, boyfriend, friends, professors, and other random people in my life asking how it is going and all I can say is....."ummm" Cause truth is, it hasn't gone hardly anywhere. So sad. what is worse is the fact that I'm on the border of lying to people just to have them back off. I haven't gone there yet...I'm trying my hardest to stay away from there....I know what kind of cess pool that could lead to *sigh*

My boyfriend has decided we need to buy a house. He wants one badly, and to be honest, I can't fault him. If I was still living with my parents I would be clawing at the door to get out. Not that my parents aren't awesome, but it is hard to live a "grown up" life with your parents still asking you to bring your laundry down or clean your room =0p anyway, he has been saving cash like mad...which is awesome!...I've always been on his ass to save money...but it is sad too. It is kind of frightening too though. I feel like I'm about to have all safety platforms ripped out from under me. Once I take that jump, in my mind, it is done. We will be as good as married. We've been together for a very long time, and I love him tons, but there are a couple of personality flaws between us that I'm not sure will ever iron out. I guess that is how it is with a lot of couples --and without some strife, there wouldn't be as much love (or love wouldn't be as noticable--) but it still worries me.

On the weight loss front, things have really stalled out. Once I lost that major goal of a Vegas vacation, most of my motivation instantly went out the door. After Vegas, I was back up to my orginal starting weight in no time. Back to the 190s. Boo! So, I started trying to get my butt back to at least eating right. I'm down to fluxing between 180 and 183 right now. I really want to see those 170s come back. I need to start busting my ass. I just can't find that motivation. I kind of wish I had the cash for a personal trainer. Someone to yell at me when I don't show up and bust my ass and someone to hug me when I make it down a couple of pounds. I really, really, REALLY think blogging helped keep me on track. Even though you ladies and gentleman were so far away, I felt some accountability. Funny how that works, isn't it? I've never met you and I'll most likely never meet you....but yet I still value your thoughts.

Forgive me for my absence. I will try very hard to start blogging on a regular basis during the week. Weekends are still mine to hide behind the couch with a bag of chips *sneaks off*