I'm back!!!

Hi everyone! I'm back!! Vegas was amazing. I really and truely love it there so much. I've been 100% off track since returning though, as you can probably see with my lack of posts. There has literally been no order in my life since returning. I sleep weird hours, eat at strange times, loaf around the house when chores should be done, etc. It hasn't been pretty. I wish I could say next week will be better, but I know it won't be (and I'll provide an explanation later on in this post)

First and foremost, I want to say congrats to all the Race to the Shower winners! I think everyone that participated was a winner! I didn't do a final weigh-in since I was either going crazy making plans for Vegas or in Vegas when the final weight loss was supposed to be tallied, but I loved the idea of a challenge and everyone was great! I think I'll try to get involved in another challenge in the future. Now that I don't have a solid deadline for wanting to loose weight, I find myself highly unmotivated. I knew, before Vegas, that I had X amount of time to lose weight. There wasn't any "ifs, ands, or buts" about it. The plane left on a certain day and I wanted to be on it a lighter woman. Now I need to find another motivating factor. I picked back up about 10 pounds while in vegas (yay for liquid bread...a.k.a. beer!) so that needs to come off.

I'm not 100% sure what happened in Vegas, but I think I grew up just a little bit while I was down there. LoL. That shouldn't happen when you are in Vegas of all places, but it really got me thinking that I wanted to be married (I've been with my b/f 7 years now) and have a house and think about having kids one day. It is kind of odd. I've always been the person in this relationship that is pushing off setting "grown up" goals, but now, something inside is telling me to go for it. Which is truely ironic since the b/f has been in a lousy mood since getting back. I guess that shows ya how much you care for a person, when you are ready to start shopping for houses with them even though you just want to slap them across the face and tell them to stop being depressed =0p *sends mental hugs his way* Love him to death. Wish I knew what was bothering him. But until he is ready to share/work-on the problem, wish he'd just cheer up.

Speaking of cheering up, I'm being a bit of a self centered prick myself. hehe. At least I know I'm a little sore though =0) My sister is having a baby. Yay! this will be her 4th child. (poor girl! she will have 4 boys under the age of 4 next week) and it is scheduled to be born....*dramatic pause*.....on my birthday! *wails with grief* I feel bad, but damn it! I don't want to share my birthday. How awful is it for me to be mad at a little baby that isn't even born yet. LoL. So, even more sad is the fact she is being purposely induced on my birthday (when the doctor was able to schedule the labor room) and on my birthday, I'll be getting up at 5:30am so I can drive over to her house and watch her 3 kids.....a 4-year-old and twin 1-year-olds. Happy birthday to me!

She feels bad about it because she knows birthday are a HUGE deal for me. Growing up, it just so happened that scout camp always fell on the week of my birthday, so my dad and the majority of my siblings would never be home on my "special day". So now that I control my birthday actions, I always make a huge celebration out of it. My sis kept telling me she was going to get me a huge present to say thanks, but I don't think she understood that I didn't want a present. I'll do this for her because I love her and she needs my help, not because I want something, but I can't/won't lie about not *really* wanting to do it. Waking up early, changing dirty diapers, watching Thomas the Train movies and trying to figure out what a screaming child wants just wasn't in the birthday plans. *sigh* yeah, writing about it isn't making me feel any better. I really am pouting over it --like I said--I'm a little sore over it.

So, I probably won't get to write next week. I'll be "on call" just in case my sis goes into labor early. that means I'll be shacking up with either my b/f or my parents just waiting around. Which, in my humble opinion, just waiting around is about the worst form of torture available...with the exception of that screaming, dirty diapered child. =0)